Choose Your Words

This morning I received some invaluable advice.

I was chatting to a friend about my "to do" list (we all have one of those, right?) and I was prattling on about how "I just need to do this thing", when she said:

"How about you re-frame your words to 'I would really love to do this thing'?"

And in that moment my light bulb went on & I was like "OMG! Of course!"

I am a huge fan of Louis Hay's work, and she teaches "The thoughts we think & the words we speak are constantly shaping our world & our experiences."¹; in particular that "what you put your attention on grows"² - that "the more you dwell on what you don't want, the more of it you create"².

As in, thinking "I don't want to be fat" - you stay overweight. Telling yourself "I don't want to be broke" - you stay penniless.

I've read/heard somewhere along the way that the mind doesn't recognise the word "don't", and that if I say to you "don't think of pink elephants" there's a good chance that you're now picturing a parade of them & humming along to their song!

You're welcome btw. ;)

As an example: Another friend of mine told me how she had a rather important task to do at work, and that she was so worried that she'd mess up, she kept telling herself "I don't want to make a mistake. I don't want to make a mistake." And what happened? She made a mistake! Luckily it wasn't as bad as she thought it would be, but I still found it rather amusing that she did mess up after all... almost as if she'd been instructing herself "I want to make a mistake"..?

I know... I'm mean... but it's interesting, right?

Another thing I find quite funny is how so many people say "don't forget!"... and then inevitably someone forgets... which is why I make it a point of saying "please remember" in the hopes that the message will get through!

(To be clear: I haven't actually tested to see if this theory works, but I haven't noticed any instances of forgetting to remember lol.)

So in terms of this morning's advice, I absolutely LOVE it because it shifts the energy of the task on my "to do" list. Instead of it being something I need to do - which for me carries this low level anxiety with it as it's yet another line added to my already (seemingly) mile-long list! By saying "I would really love to do this thing" it changes (ever so slightly) to something more enjoyable & exciting - something I can look forward to doing because it's fun - instead of being that thing that I secretly dread because it's more work or another obligation on my time.

Even if saying "I would really love to do this thing" is a bit of a reach - because let's face it, some tasks are just outright crappy to do & the thought of loving it just makes me shudder, urgh - saying something like "it would be really helpful to do this thing" works too - I've used that one quite often & whaddaya know, it IS helpful! ;)

Does all this make sense? I hope so.

And I hope it helps you to start noticing which words you use in your life, and to start re-framing them to more uplifting & encouraging ones.

♥

¹From "101 Power Thoughts" - Louise L. Hay

²From "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay